Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Austin Ali strikes again

Currently in the Austin Ali house we are having some [more] issues with pest control.  I really don't want to go into specifics, but there was another scorpion RIGHT next to Logie's baby pool yesterday, and this morning as Willis was getting dressed in the closet, he exclaimed, "THERE.IS.A.GIANT.BUG.IN.THE.CLOSET.THAT.IS.NOT.A.SCORPION!!!" 

I love that lately if he sees a bug he IMMEDIATELY interjects that it is not a scorpion. 

Anywaaaay, since I am also a freak now about poisonous things around my precious baby (thanks to my friend Ashley) (are you AWARE of how much Bromine is in the Snugride 35 carseat?  Are you??) I decided to hire an organic pest control company and fire my existing, totally poisonous company. 

Today a salesman showed up at my door from the organic company ready to partake in a little salesman-housewife waltz in my kitchen.  I wasn't having any of it.

Chem-free Mike [after spending 15 minutes scouring the backyard, [installing hidden cameras in] my attic, etc.]:  "See, what our company is really about are the details.  Details.  See, I could tell in just 5 minutes of doing the perimeter check that your previous compan-"
me [interrupting]:  Listen, Mike, I appreciate what you are trying to do here.  But my baby has to go down for a nap in ten minutes.  Can we just go over what it is you do and how much I have to pay you?
Chem-free Mike:  "I was just getting to that.  We kill off the entire LIFE CYCLE, you see.  For what you are dealing with, I recommend the year long agreement where we will do a full sweep of your attic, perimeter, garage, and -"
me [interrupting]: "Can I cancel at anytime?"
Chem-free Mike:  "Yes."

Fast forward about 6 minutes to me signing the paperwork.  Chem-free Mike has already set up the appointment, is filling out the auto-pay sheet, and I just need to sign on the dotted line.  He thinks it's a done deal. 

me:  "What's this 'terms agreement' I see on the back, where it's saying this is for a full year?  This sort of reads to me like a contract.  I don't want to sign a contract.  I want to be able to pick up my phone in two months and tell you to not come back to my house if I want to and tell you to stop charging my card."
Chem-free Mike:  "This is our agreement.  Our agreement that we will take care of your problem, but see, our treatment is VERY... SPECIFIC.  You should want our services for the year.  If you only want treatment for TWO MONTHS, then maybe we aren't the right company for you."

This, of course, made me a little... bunchy. 

me:  "First of all, please don't tell me what I SHOULD want.  Second of all, let me be VERY SPECIFIC with you.  I'm not signing something saying I have to pay you for a year.  We don't even know where we'll be in a year.  What if we don't even LIVE here?"
Chem-free Mike [getting agitated]:  "All we ask is you give us 30 days to make it right.  Then you can cancel."
me [finishing reading the fine print, where it says just that]: "gotcha."

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Wanna see Logie eating avocados?


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