Hail Bay

Today as Willis and I were driving to Home Depot with a [precious] sleeping Logie in the backseat, I saw a truck pulling a few bails of hay that I felt the need to point out. 

me:  "Look at those huge hail bays!  So cool."
Willis:  "Did you say hail bay?  Do you mean those bails of hay?" 
me:  "Oh you know what I mean."

I'm telling you, something HAPPENED to me after Logie arrived.  They call it "baby brain", but I fear mine is WAY worse.  It's as if they removed half of my brain (along with the most precious child in the universe -- no offense everyone else with babies) on February 1st.  Not only do I call objects by the wrong name, several times a day I'll know what I want to say but I just can't.get.it.out.  Like the word is stuck on my tongue.*

Let's be honest, I didn't have a ton to lose to begin with.  And let's not even discuss the fact that I think bails of hay are worth mentioning. 

At least Willis knows what it will be like living with me as an old lady, ripe with dementia.  (EW, RIPE!)  A glimpse into his future, if you will.

I love you, Willis and Logie Bear.

Perhaps the part of the brain they removed was also the section responsible for putting myself together -- choosing outfits, etc.  I'm just sort of...disheveled these days, and I feel like now when I'm in public I look like a complete degenerate. 

The way a worker responded to me today at Home Depot helped drive my fear home.

me [next to Willis, who was pushing precious sleeping Logan in his stroller]:  "Do you sell patio sails?"  (don't ask)
Home Depot worker:  "we don't have those, but we do have some big outdoor umbrellas over there. [pointing, then looking back at me]  But they are REALLY expensive.  You might want to try Bed Bath and Beyond."

As she walked away, my mouth kind of dropped and I said to Willis, "UMMM.... what the hell did she mean by that?!  Do you think she thinks we CAN'T AFFORD the expensive umbrellas?  Why would she say that otherwise?  We should buy one just to spite her." 

Poor Willis.  He just shook his head and said "I don't think she meant anything by that, other than that they are expensive.  She looks like an amazon woman anyway." 

Then we walked over to the umbrellas ... which were $299...  and I said "$300 for an UMBRELLA!?  F that!" 

Wanna see our new family member?  That's Agave.  And are you worried that I'll JUST NEVER SHUT UP!?  Don't worry, I'm done after this.

Now that I am looking at this, I think those tealights
look a little gay.

(*hate that word too).