Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Catfight

I'm taking a break from unpacking because my feet are killing me!  I was in jammies sporting my tennis shoes in the kitchen to try and get a little more support.  Yes, I refer to sneakers as tennis shoes; no, I never stop whining. 

Normally I would have complete agita being surrounded by a sea of boxes, but it's not really bothering me for some reason.  I think it's because I'm just so happy that yesterday is o-v-e-r.  I'm not sure that I would use Mustang Movers again, but that's a story for another day, and I've always heard that if you can't say something nice...

...then tell the story about the CATFIGHT you got in yesterday!  ME-OW! 

Here's a little background.  Apparently in our building you have to reserve the freight elevator when you move.  Mustang Movers found out the hard way and had to wait for 2 1/2 hours for 2 other moves to finish before they could use it.  Oops.  You see, their boss told me that he was going to check with the office to see if they needed to do anything, so I figured that everything was taken care of.  You know what they say about ASSuming.  Don't worry, though, we gave them an extra hungee and I got them pizzas for their trouble. 

Fast forward to me waiting at the bottom of the freight elevator to put in my key card when up walks HB (Heinous Bitch) with her dog.  HB marches up to the button, and after she presses it, I say "oh, the elevator is stuck on 4 right now with some movers."  Things got really heated really fast so I honestly can't remember the exact dialogue that was exchanged, but here are some highlights.  She was yelling.  And I was all red and blotchy with hot ears by the end. 

Highlights from HB below.  Picture a more sun-damaged Angela from The Office: 

"You people have no consideration for your neighbors, you have been hogging this elevator all day!!!!"  [editor's note - I had gotten there 3 minutes prior and my movers had been waiting to use it for hours]

"This is crazy!!!!!!"  [editor's note - we had literally only been waiting for 2.5 minutes for them to come down with my first load of furniture]

"Maybe like normal people you could make some room for others in the elevator when you pack your shit!!"  [editor's note - my movers hadn't even made one trip yet, and lady, I think it's fairly obvious I'm not the one packing shit in the elevator]

"This has never been a problem before your move today!!!!!!  [see first editor's note]

Highlights from me, after I tried explaining that we had just started the move:

"This is a FREIGHT elevator - to be used for FREIGHT.  Why don't you use the inside elevator like everyone else?!"  To which she points to her poor limping dog and rolls her eyes and huffs and puffs so I scream, "WELL I AM JUST TRYING TO HELP!"

"Geez!!" 

"You need to relax!"

"None of this is my fault!"

"You're going to scream at a PREGNANT LADY for something that's not even her fault!?"  She really liked this one.  I think I got an "oh, PLEASE." 

After she tried to unsuccessfully jam herself and her dog in the elevator with all of my furniture and the 3 movers as soon as the elevator arrived, the movers told her to (politely) to get out of the way so they could unload.  Then the 5 of us rode back up together - like one big happy family.   Except with her still huffing and puffing and mumbling and me suggesting that if she has such an issue, she should just call the office.  "OH I WILLLLLL!!!"  (oh no, I'm scared.)  I just couldn't hold back so I turned and said to Neck Tattoo (mover #2), "see why we are moving?  All of our neighbors are just as bad as she is."   Well, HB didn't like this AT ALL.  Once we reached her floor, she stormed out and yelled "GET OVER YOURSELF!  GOOD F@CKING RIDDANCE TO YOU!!!!" 

Once the door closed I called her some very bad names which the movers loved, then Neck Tattoo got really excited and said, "Yeah!! I bet it was her fault that her dog had to have surgery!!!"  Um, ok Neck Tattoo - I don't really understand what that means or how that's really an insult, but I get that you are trying to hate on HB so I'll take it.

Hey HB - see you next Tuesday!!!!!  (C U Next.....)

2 comments:

  1. God I wish I was with you when these things happened. The two of us could really do some damage to this HB.

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  2. OMG. Dying!!! You should go back and leave a flaming bag of cat-poo in front of her door.

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